the nape of her husbands neck
by Keepcalmforlove
Summary: "i hate you, so much" she said,


**guess what? i literally just wrote it and it' s unedited and literal shit! whatever i'm gonna post it anyway! i know it's bad but i'm trying to write more to improve my writing and i hate just writing and not putting it somewhere so i decided to post this. don't judge too hard. review :)**

They get married and she's the maid of honor. She stands behind Riley and looks in his eyes as it all happens. They say their vows, they say I love you, Riley cries, Lucas smiles, Maya tears up. She watches them say these words and right before they kiss he looks at her, before turning to kiss her best friend. She cries, and she tells everyone they're tears of joy. She spends the rest of the night drinking, and she dances with Josh and Farkle and Zay. She tries to get drunk but they cut her off, and when Farkle drives her home he knows she's sad and he knows why.

"It's all over now." Maya says, her feet on the dashboard of the car and her makeup running down her face.

"I know." Farkle says, and he's not sure what else to say. Can he say he's sorry, when what they've been doing is terrible to Riley? Can he say it's better this way, when he's not sure it is? So he just leaves it at that, then eats icecream with Maya until she falls asleep during a movie.

They're back from their two week honeymoon and are moving into their new apartment. Riley asks everyone to help them move in, and Maya dreads seeing Lucas but goes anyway.

She doesn't know how she did it, be with Lucas while he was with Riley. It keeps her up at night, the guilt. How can she do that to her best friend? How can she lie to her, how can she love the man she's loved all her life? She thinks there's something wrong with her, but then again Lucas was part of it too and he married Riley. Now he's in a marriage rooted in lies and she's full of guilt.

She goes and she sees Farkle and Zay's cars already parked outside. She walks into the nearly empty apartment, only being filled with boxes and some furniture at the moment. This might take all day, and she knows it should be fun (if she can forget about him.)

Riley notices her best friend and runs to hug her. She tells her about the trip, and the apartment. Maya listens, she laughs, and she misses when things were easier. When she didn't have to lie. They talk, and Zay makes a joke, and Farkle laughs, and Lucas is somewhere else. Maya's glad he hasn't come out and said hello yet, but she knows he will soon.

Things get easier, Lucas starts talking to her and it isn't as bad as she thought it'd be. They don't talk about it, and it's unspoken but they know they shouldn't (not anytime soon at least.). So the parties they go to are easier, and they're fun. Things start to go back to normal, and she thinks about it less. She spends more time with Farkle and Zay, they go to Farkle's and watch movies and make fun of Lucas and Riley for being married so young. They only do this because they're all single and bitter and can only be this way with each other.

She can tell Riley is sad they're not spending as much time together as before, and she thinks Riley knows something's wrong. She feels bad, but it's for the best right now. They're in their twenties and Riley and Lucas are getting used to the married life and the rest of the group are still figuring their lives out. Things will be different, and it hurts them all.

It's months later when Maya's left alone one night and has nothing left to think about. She doesn't understand, and she's sad, and she's angry. She loved him, he loved her, why did this all happen? Why did her best friend have to stay in love with him? Why did he have to fall in love with her while being with her best friend? Why didn't he leave Riley? Why didn't she stop it? Why didn't she tell Riley?

So now she's overthinking it all and she's drinking all her liquor and buying more. She wants to get drunk, she wants to get wasted, she wants to forget it all. So she drinks, and she goes to their house. She needs to tell Riley, and she needs to slap him. That's what she has to do, then maybe things will be better.

So she goes, and Lucas answers the door acting worried for her. She hates it, and she screams Riley's name waiting for her to come out.

"She's not here, she's visiting her grandparents and I had to stay for work." Lucas says, and Maya curses herself. Of course Riley was gone, of course she came when Lucas was alone, what else could she expect.

She sighed "Well I still got something to say to you!" Maya yelled, slurring her words and walking into the apartment. She looked around at the room she helped set up, it was now a home for a happy couple.

She turns around to look at him, and she glares while closing the proximity between them. "I hate you." she says, pushing her finger on his chest.

He just stares, he doesn't know what to do or say. So he stays there and listens to her. "You broke my heart, and you married my best friend. You left me all alone. You let me live with this guilt! You're an asshole you know that right? I hate you." She said, trying her best to be mean and get her point across even though her mind was foggy.

"I hate you, so much." she said, and she kept saying it. It was all she could say, so she repeated it until she accepted what was happening. She repeated it until there were tears falling down her face. She repeated it until he hugged her, keeping her up because she was so tired and just wanted to lay down.

She finally stopped, crying in his arms, her face in the nape of her husband's neck. Her best friends husbands neck.

"I'm sorry." he says, holding in his own tears and holding her close.

All she can say is "I know."


End file.
